Nepenthe

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
my tiny, winged friend resided inside a garden
which boasted more blossoms than my nonexistent one,
one day she found her way to me
looking for kith or maybe a kindred soul
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
a friendship created out of need,
out of sorrow and shared grief
reminiscent past, existent present, pendulous future
all lost in dark shadows
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
she had come from the first rosy dawn
and had seen lives go by
in flames of different colors
past passions, dreams, hopes forgotten
we drank the wind
our nepenthe

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
one day we watched the day slip by
into eternity
while I lay in the sweet grass, casting a large shadow
and my one-inch friend sat on my dozing cat
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
her awful aura of immortality
extending into an ominous future, forever hearing
the timeless laments of the world
which we sang together and then
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
flying through the air as I watched
chained to the ground,
every movement holding envious, fluid grace
she settled on my palm and
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

Each time we met my name was new to my little friend,
immortal, winged creature
more Earthbound than I
faery seeking perfection where there is none
the sorrows of the world forgotten only when
we drank the wind
our nepenthe.

***

This is one of the few non hasty poems I have ever written. I spent two days(a record) arranging/adding/deleting/etc. I’m very curious as to what you think about it, do criticize/comment.
Thank you

~Tally

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25 thoughts on “Nepenthe

  1. some sadness,
    some people change their definition of friendship along the way, which is the sorrow of life.

    two days, you did do great.

    honest and thoughtful…

    1. Hmm… interesting comment you got me thinking what my definition of friendship is. I guess I would say that its love and trust through the sorrows of life.
      Thanks for your comment, appreciate it.

  2. The refrain

    “we drank the wind
    our nepenthe”

    Is gorgeous, loved that you used “nepenthe”

    “Each time we met my name was new…” fantastic poetry, it would have been easier to say that the creature changed, but that you did is such a wonderful symbolic phrase.

    Great piece ~ Rose

  3. I also love your last two lines.
    Maybe you could have begun with
    ‘Each time I met a new little friend’.
    I was a little puzzled by the first line.
    Apart from that small puzzle (which perhaps you meant to incorporate to give mystery) I absolutely loved the mystic feel of it. Very well done. A poem of this length always takes me two days at least… sometimes longer.
    I think it is useful to leave it for a day or two and re-read because the muse may want some slight alteration.

  4. I think I’ve visited about 50 poetry sites in the last two days, and this is clearly one of the two best poems I’ve seen. I’m sure it’s the longest one I’ve bothered to finish (I’m rude that way, quickly scanning what others have labored over).

    The feeling of starting over again at each encounter is palpable.

  5. @Helen-Glad you like it. Thanks for Reading!

    @C Rose-There is more to the first line than it appears(I won’t say anymore than that), glad you enjoyed it.

    @tigerbrite-Thanks for both pieces of advice, I should have waited another day before posting and maybe I would have changed/added enough so that the first line wasn’t so puzzling. But there is a reason to it, I just won’t say what it is, so as not to influence others interpretations:)

    @Purvi-I’m glad you think it’s unique! It means a lot, thanks.

    @Virual Sinner-Thanks for such a nice comment, I’m flattered that you liked it that much. And I am also guilty of skimming through the longer ones at times(but if something catches my attention I read from the very beginning). My poems aren’t usually this long.
    And to be truthful to you last sentence, I really didn’t concentrate that much on the “starting over again at each encounter”, there were subtler things that I worked on more. But I’m glad you liked it.

    Thanks everyone for your comments.

  6. I am in awe. I read the first few lines, then wanted to know who you are. Went to your ‘about’ page and read it and discovered you to be 15. I came back and read the whole prose and am still in awe.
    Fabulous writing for one so young. You have a true gift.
    Wonderful!

  7. I love the fact that you start again each stanza and reweave the tale to return to the refrain. Every time you use a repeated-line form you do need to rewrite to get those lines to square with the rest. You should try a villanelle! Nice work.

  8. I love your ethereal wandering back and forth of the trials and tribulations of us, humanity and the freedom that creatures in the natural world present to us! How much we want to be free of struggle! The polar opposites you presented in your creation is really, very beautiful! Cindy

  9. I like this very much. I, like you, write most of my poetry quickly. Sometimes I don’t really know how it forms in my mind. Two days would be a record for me. Two hours, really. Lately, I have been taking more time with editing than with the initial writing. 🙂

    Someone made a suggestion regarding the first line. The only thing I would consider changing is the repeated image of a “little friend…tiny, winged friend”. It could be a smoother read without the double reference to size. Perhaps: Each time we met, my name was new to her. Above every other consideration, it is your poem. Always do what your inner voice tells you before you listen to any other.

    Much enjoyed,
    Shirley

  10. One feels like reading this poem again and again…there is a certain air of immortality attached to that little winged thing…a sense of deja vu that lingers…as if the other one reappearing from time to time differed only in the name , but the essence was in continuity. Loved the sense of timelessness it evokes …the repeated refrain “We drank the wind our nepenthe” fills the reader with a sense of drowsiness (somehow reminiscent of the words of Keats…as if of hemlock I had drunk, in Ode to a Nightingale). Really loved it.

  11. Thanks guys for reading.

    @Daydreamertoo-Your comment means a lot to me, thank you so much for your encouraging words. I’m young and I have much to learn, glad you liked my blog.

    @mairmusic-Thanks a lot for your advice, I’ll keep it in mind, a villanelle sounds pretty interesting, I may just have to try it!

    @carefreewanderer-I’m happy you enjoyed it, thanks so much for reading and commenting.

    @Cindy Eksuzian-I appreciate your comment and how you wonderfully you described my poem. I enjoyed your poem a lot.

    @Shirley Alexander-I’m glad I am not alone in writing hasty poetry. I really want to get in the habit of editing my writing though. Thank you for taking the time to find a way to make it smoother in reading and I especially will take to heart the advice for listening to my inner voice. Though your line sounds better it’s still not quite what I was thinking. But thank you so much!!

    @dreamingthruthetwilight-That you would be reminded of Keats while reading my own humble poetry is a great honor, thank you so much. I’m glad that you sensed great feelings while reading, that is a poet’s goal after all, to convey emotion. As to your second comment, perhaps the faery is just our imagination that becomes untamed when we are bored, or perhaps there is a faery out there somewhere in a garden forever immortal!

  12. There is sheer beauty in your thoughts and I loved the word “Nepenthe” too….For someone so young this is terrific coherent yet imaginative writing…hope you come out with more such jewels..i wish I could have met your fantasy friend. Enjoy your weekend 🙂

  13. Your write so well. Great imagination with a nice flow.
    Sorrow wrapped in silk!
    Wish everybody has a friend to share the nepenthe! 🙂

  14. @Rekha- Thank you for your encouraging words, enjoy your weekend as well:)

    @mindlovemisery-Thanks:) I appreciate your comment

    @Hema-Sometimes our friends are our nepenthe! Thanks for reading!

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